A social drinker is one who indulges some (or a lot) when in a social setting. A bar, a dinner, a party... etc. etc.
I am a social eater.
I am very focused and disciplined... unless... I am in front of a lot of food. Then... I am in a whole LOT of trouble.
We were supposed to have 2 karate moms (with children) over for dinner, and then the kids were going to play outside... No big deal. I'd make pizza for the adults (I'd pair it with salad, so I could eat a LOT of that) and what kid doesn't like chicken nuggets and french fries. This was no big deal, I could handle this....
Low and behold... drama ensued.. and my favorite karate family was coming home a day early from vacation.. and if I didn't invite them... the 2 other karate moms would have made an issue.
So.. I invited the 2 parents and daughter to come to our little shindig...
This took the head count from 7 people to 10 people...
Being Sicilian, it is in my blood to feed people. I instantly didn't think I had enough food to feed 10 people. I was probably wrong. I went out, and I bought chips and dips and a large Italian sub.
Then it happened... while cutting the Italian Sub into individual portions...
My stomach and my brain... Well, they had this epic battle... and my stomach won... AND MY BRAIN WENT AWOL.
Let me describe this epic battle.
I was cutting the sandwiches into individual slices, when I got to the end of the sandwich.. it was "small" (read: smaller than the other pieces).. and my stomach said to my brain "Hey, you should eat that, no one likes eating the ENDS of the sandwiches. It's SMALL, no biggie..."
My brain KNEW this was BS. And tried to fight back, "No. We ate lunch, and we do not need all the meat and cheese and oil and mayo that is on this BIG end of the sandwich. And, it's a huge hero... everyone LOVES a huge hero."
My stomach persisted, "If everyone loves a huge hero, why aren't you having a piece then?"
My brain was speechless... I ate the end of the sandwich.
Then, while waiting for people to arrive, I had a couple chips, and small scoops of dip...
I had a glass of wine while talking with people.
I had another piece of the hero, a slice of pizza, a few chicken nuggets, and fries... I had 2 s'mores and a cookie.. and an OREO CHEESECAKE POP (brought by one of the moms.)
My name is Kat, and I am a social over eater.
I woke up on Saturday morning feeling gross... I binged.. It happens, I'm not off the wagon... I looked at myself and said.. THIS IS NO BIG DEAL, you will walk it off while at the Faire today... and you will eat normally tonight... THIS IS NO BIG DEAL.
I was good at fair, I had one chocolate covered strawberry, that someone gave me. I had no desire to eat any of the fair food.. .I felt strong...
We got home, and had to get showered and changed for a cook out. I grabbed a watermelon, and my seltzer water. I was determined to behave. I knew there was clams... and how many I could have, and what I was going to allow myself to eat.
I got to the cook out, and the epic battle between brain and stomach began again.
And I ... I let my stomach win, again.
I won't go into details... but, once again... I realized that
My name is Kat, and I am a social over eater.
I spent Sunday at home with Emry, no fair... He was exhausted, and so was I.
And, not to mention.. thoroughly disappointed in myself.
THESE THINGS HAPPEN. I need to know they will happen.
The important thing is that I get back up, dust myself off, and get back on the DAMN HORSE (so to speak).
I woke up this morning... 3.6 pounds heavier than I was on Friday morning.
It is NOT awful.. It is NOT the end of the world. I will just keep up my routine, and not deviate.
It's the summer, it's Faire season, and it's right when everyone is trying to pack in their parties and hang outs before all of our kids go back to school.. and our lives are... so much SMALLER and less COLORFUL...
I need to be accountable.
I need to know where I want to be...
And what I need to do to get back there...
I need to know, that I will go up... But, that I will also go RIGHT BACK DOWN...
I need to keep in mind that this Social Binge Eating, could become a problem.
A serious one.
And that I need to start to be better prepared for these things.
I need to learn how to be a smarter party eater.
It's all about moderation.
It's all about learning your boundaries...
But, it's more about SETTING the boundaries more FIRMLY when you are in a situation when you feel you are at your weakest.
This weekend was a lesson.
Now, I'm going to do the homework... and figure out how to never let it go THIS far again.
What about you?
When do you find your eating habits are there worst?
How do you prepare yourself?
What tricks do you have?