I don't really know how to say our weekend was... Overall, it was good.
There were moments that were completely overwhelming, and moments that caused me to cry.. But, that only seemed to make up a tiny percentage of the overall weekend.
Friday night was spent doing the housework, and going to pick up something for the wedding favors... We were able to have a nice amount of family time, and just... be together. I did my night exercises, and all was well.
Saturday, I woke up early, and did the outdoor hill training.
I ran this in 41 miuntes, and that makes them 11 minute miles. Now, hill training, for me, at least is not about the speed.. it's about doing it.. It's about running/jogging up major hills without stopping. It's about the challenge. And I hope you can see from the image, that this was no mole hill.. This was a pretty big hill.. At least for me.
After that I went to the Y, and did the 8:45a Tabata class... which focused a lot on SQUATS... Which I loved, but, oh boy I am still feeling it!
Emry's last swim class for this session went well, and we will be starting up with the next session in about two weeks. And, we are very much holding strong to, "YOU WILL LEARN TO SWIM NO MATTER HOW LONG IT TAKES"... and that means we will sign him up for back to back sessions until he can do it. Hopefully this session is the one that really cements that. *Fingers Crossed*
After that, the day went... weird. Klay and I hadn't been talking since the stupidity with his mother. We were KIND of talking on Thursday night, it wasn't fixed, we hadn't discussed what had HAPPENED, so I thought it be coming... eventually.. Friday night, we didn't talk about anything again.. And Saturday, during Emry's swimming lesson, Klay got this weird attitude thing going on, that transferred over to home.
I wanted the weekend to be about him! You know, Father's Day weekend, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? And his answer was just so rude, and not helpful, that I just LOST it. Not like I screamed.. but, I felt like I was going to sob... again... so I just put my head down, and scrubbed a pan in the sink. OH BOY does that thing SPARKLE right now.
I took a bath, and I tried to just decompress... I tried to let it go.. But, in my head, it was just "Why isn't this important to talk about? Why won't he talk about this with me? Am I supposed to ask.. again? Why is this not important?" And I kept going and going... I got dressed, because we were going to the carnival that evening... I laid on the couch, and I just tried not to cry... He sits next to me and just squeezes my foot... And I lost it.. I cried.. loudly. And he was all taken off guard. I can't help the mood swings.. He's nice and loving.. and then he isn't talking to me. We are fucking adults... This had to stop.
So.. we had the "conversation".. and the first half of that conversation.. was a SCREAMING MATCH.. and when it got too tense.. And he wasn't hearing a word I was saying, because he was preparing his comeback to whatever he THOUGHT I was saying... I screamed that I needed a break... and I went into the bathroom.. and just CRIED.
My son came in, and I realized how stupid we were. Not that Emry shouldn't hear fighting... Families fight. It happens. But, the level of it.. was... jarring. I felt so stupid. Emry was crying.. and I just held him on my lap and told him everything was going to be okay. That mommies and daddies fight.. and the more they love each other, usually it's the louder the arguments... It was going to be okay. We just had to get passed it.
I came out of the bathroom, Klay and I just stared at each other. We finally agreed we would not yell anymore. And we talked it through... And that talk took a while. But, we definitely got it all out there.
I told him how much I hate that since we started planning this wedding... that we've been yelling every couple of months.. and it's always over something his Mother starts. That I know this is normal protocol for weddings, but we aren't normal.. and I don't want this to happen again. I just feel like it takes a piece of me... Does that make sense?
We hugged it out, and the rest of the day was nice. We went for BBQ dinner, and I had the most amazing red cabbage slaw, with some pulled chicken. And then OFF to the carnival.
Emry is officially big enough to ride the BIG KID RIDES.. like ALL of them. It was really epic. We had such an amazing time. We played some games. And we went home. It was really a nice way to end the ... weird day.
Sunday, Father's Day! I didn't get as much workouts in as I wanted. I woke up early, so I could make the Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes Klay wanted (made with applesauce, and almond milk - healthier pancakes!) ... And that took some time to prepare.. So my run was out the door... **SIGHS** I got my PM strength workout in... but I did it in the morning, because I knew the Y was also out the door.. **DOUBLE SIGHS**
We spent Father's day at a family BBQ, that was celebrating the wedding of a mutual friend's sister. I know that relation sounds weird... but, we were considered "close friends" so we were invited. It was a lot of fun. The men played frisbee.. and it was nice and sunny... I couldn't have asked for a nicer day.
Only hiccup, Klay's parents were there, and his mother refused to look me in the eye. I know I haven't really labeled what the drama was... but, it ended with me basically making my invisible on the internet to her. She's still on my FB friends (Because deleting her would cause a major problem) but she can no longer message me from there.. it says that I am "unavailable"... And I think she figured it out. I just refuse to get sucked in to her written drama, because she reads TOO MUCH into things that are written, and OVER REACTS to everything. I'm not doing it. She needs something, she can CALL ME... no more of this written conversations.. It doesn't work with us.
IT JUST DOESN'T.
But, yeah.. she wouldn't look me in the eye.. they didn't sit with us, when we ate... and basically ignored us. Really mature... REALLY mature. Klay and I tried to get them into conversations.. but, it just didn't take... We tried.. they didn't.. I'm okay with that.
But - in the long run... they need to get over themselves.
After the bbq, it was already about 5p.. so the day was basically over... I got ready for today, by packing my lunch and my vitamins... Laying out my clothes... Making sure that I had everything in my work purse that I needed... Got my running gear together....
We watched the Game of Thrones series finale.. OH, SPOILER ALERT.. can we say HOUSE LANNISTER DID NOT HAVE A HAPPY FATHER'S DAY? WOW.
This morning, was Speed Run.. So 6.5mph for 30 minutes. What I ended up doing, was 6.5 mph for 8 min 43 seconds, and then 45 seconds at 7.0mph. 28 minutes and 25 seconds later I reached 3.1 miles.. I turned the treadmill all the way down and I walked it out until the 30 minute mark.
I got my Ab/Core workout in... And had a couple extra minutes.. so I worked on my triceps for a couple reps... NO FLABBY ARMS!!! AM I RIGHT?!
I feel good..
And, I can't wait to see.. I'm 5 days in to my 14 day Reset.... Who thinks I'm going to achieve my goal this week? I think I am ... hell.. I know I am!
Happy Monday People!